


The Darkness

by deawrites



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Adult Content, Explicit Language, Gun Violence, Homoeroticism, M/M, Murder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Drama, Psychological Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-26
Updated: 2017-06-26
Packaged: 2018-11-19 04:58:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11306151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deawrites/pseuds/deawrites
Summary: Jim and Harvey are held captive for several weeks in the darkness.





	The Darkness

**Author's Note:**

> All comments, questions, suggestions, criticisms and kudos welcome.
> 
> This one was a difficult to write but thanks to my wife I got my twisted ending. Repost from earlier in the day as things weren't clear about the end.

**The Darkness**

When Jim came too his head was pounding but he could smell the faint, distinct scent of another man’s aftershave. He realized there was a suit jacket beneath his head acting as a makeshift pillow. He groaned and moved a hand to his head and attempted to sit up. His head spun like a top and he felt abruptly nauseated.

 

“You have a concussion. Just lay still for now.” He heard a voice drift to him from above. “It’s not like there’s much to see anyway.” The voice sounded tired.

 

“Where are we?” Jim asked closing his eyes to the darkness and gently massaged his temples.

 

“I don’t know.” There was a shuffle of movement on concrete and the voice was abruptly closer. “Same as for the ‘who put us here’ or ‘why’ questions.” The voice informed him cutting to the chase. “I got hit from behind, just like you I’m guessing, and I’ve been here for what feels like days. There was a different guy here earlier, but someone came in and took him away.’

 

“Some **one**?” Jim asked hand feeling the wall along side of him. Damp concrete; the floor the same.

 

“Fine, some **one’s**. Two held me down and at least took him. His name was David and he says he was here for god knows how long before I showed up; I assume what was; a few days ago.” The voice sighed. “There’s an opening for a door a few steps away from you, but it’s a flat façade and opens from the opposite side.” He then told Jim the exact dimensions of the room, including that the ceiling was the height of two men. He then told Jim about the waste bucket and air vent that at “night” pumped air-conditioned air, but that during the “day” it seemed ambient or vice versa. Meals were delivered through a small opening in the door, but that they were always kept in darkness.

 

By the time the voice was finished speaking Jim had managed to push himself up to a seated position, elbow of his right hand resting upon his knee and his forehead against his palm. The left hand was braced to help support his weight and pinned the suit jacket to the ground.  “Jim.” Jim announced softly. “My name is Jim Gordon. What’s yours?”  The sound of laughter was strange in the claustrophobia of the dark cell. “What’s so damn funny?”

 

“Law of averages.” Chuckled the voice. “It’s just I know who you are. Saw you in the paper. I’m Harvey Bullock. A detective at the 75th, fraud division.

 

“Really?” Jim asked with no mirth in the question. He rubbed his head before reaching to test the back of his skull. He found a lump there; painful to the touch; and a bit of dried blood in his hair.  “Was that guy David a cop?”

 

“Na, he was a bank teller.” Harvey silenced and for several moments neither male said anything. “Too little for a pattern yet Poster Boy.”

 

“ _Jim_.” Jim reproved stressing his name. “New to the situation, remember?” He reached out with his left hand and felt nothing but air. “Where are you sitting anyway?”

 

Harvey chuckled. “Relax Jim. I’m on your left.” He reached out and hands collided, both men starting slightly at the contact. Jim seized Harvey’s hand never so welcome for human contact in his life.

 

“The dark is,” Jim paused and reluctantly released Harvey’s hand. “stifling.”

 

“Claustrophobic.” Harvey corrected of the adjective. “David was freaked something awful by it.”

 

“And you?”

 

“I’ve had moments.” Harvey sighed. “Inevitable so, you know; don’t sweat it.”

 

“The coat yours?” Jim asked softly dually ignoring the allowance.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“Like I said Jimmy, don’t sweat it.”

 

“ _Jim_.”

 

“Wow! You are a stickler, aren’t you?”

 

“I’ve had a moment or two.” Jim shifted in his stance and placed both elbows upon his up raised knees. “I just never liked the nick names. I was always either Jim or James.”

 

“Hmm.” Harvey mused looking in Jim’s direction even though they couldn’t see one another. “Me though? I like the occasionally peppered in nick name. It’s like, a term of endearment or insult.  Depends on the person I’m addressing as to what and which. Just a personal touch. I’ll try to curtail myself with you.”

 

“I’d appreciate it.” Jim informed softly. “Unless it’s the endearing kind.”

 

Harvey chuckled. “Yeah well, I’ll answer to just about anything as long as it’s factual.”

 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Jim almost smiled to himself but he grimaced instead. His head hurt and he wished he had some ice for it. “How many meals?”

 

“What?” Harvey asked surprised by the question. “You hungry?”

 

“Not now, no. I’m just curious as to how many meals they serve us.”

 

“Two. I’ve been using that and the air vent to tell time with. After David was gone and before you got here I tried counting off seconds, minutes, hours, but I kept getting distracted.”

 

Jim didn’t bother asking how or with what, but merely accepted the information. “I could give it a try.”

 

“From what starting point though? You don’t have a reference. I started after David was taken.”

 

“I guess,” Jim paused considering. “From the time I woke up? We can’t have been talking more than five/ten minutes.”

 

“Hmm.” Harvey mused. “Sounds a bit sloppy. Again, estimating not actual.”

 

“Now who’s the stickler?”

 

Harvey laughed. “Good one. No, you’re right. Can’t be more than ten minutes. Go ahead. I can be quiet.”

 

“Thanks.” Jim took an audible breath and began mentally counting the time. He made it three minutes before his thoughts wandered and he had to estimate how many seconds he had lost. Buy double that he was exhaling hard and summoning Harvey.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Sorry, I- “Jim faltered and rubbed his temple with the fingertips of his left hand. “The room just felt so, heavy. Like a physical being.”

 

“Pitch dark will do that to you. Can’t see you hand before your face? You feel caged in. I get it. Welcome to the cylinder.”

 

Jim’s brow furrowed and he looked up in Harvey’s direction. “Cylinder?”

 

“The room, it’s round. Forgot to mention that earlier. Sorry.”

 

“Think it’s an industrial silo? Or tank?”

 

Harvey shrugged and realized that Jim could not see his mannerisms. “Filled in with some concrete? Sure. Why not?”

 

Jim sighed defeatedly and closed his eyes. Somehow the room seemed even smaller now. “Did they say anything?”

 

“Who?”

 

“The someone that came for David?”

 

“No one said a word. As for clues? We’re fucked my friend.”

 

Jim squinted his eyes shut, head throbbing. The situation was unbelievable and yet he was trapped with another man in concrete cell. Jim opened his eyes and pressed his hands to the wall as he pushed himself up upon his feet. He grunted when his equilibrium gyrated for several seconds prior to settling.

 

“Jim? What are you doing?”

 

“Stand, standing up.” Jim informed taking a deep breath to settle his stomach. “I want to check out my surroundings for myself.”

 

“Hey, knock yourself out.” Harvey permitted from below him. “Just try not to trip over the waste bucket; or me; when you’re making the circuit.”

 

“You could move to the middle of the room a little.” Jim suggested.

 

“Things tend to get a little disorienting in here when you’re not hugging the walls.” Harvey informed in rebuff of Jim’s judgements. “But don’t take my word for it, you know; _cop to cop_.”

 

Jim didn’t bother answering and slowly moved along the wall, using it for extra support as much as guidance. He counted his steps and tried not to jump when he came across the bucket. He felt past it and tapped a roll of toilet paper. Carefully edging past the two items Jim continued his circuit around the room. It was just as Harvey had described it, concrete and cylindrical. He paused at the door, it was more of a slot really that would only permit a single person through at a time. He felt the edges of it, digging his fingers into the groves seeking hinges and finding none. They must be on the opposite side of the door and he continued his journey moments later.

 

“Having a good time Jmbo?” Harvey asked sardonically. “Oops, I forgot. It’s just _Jim_. Sorry.” He sighed and was speaking more to give Jim a point of reference of distance from him but sound traveled strangely in the dark, not able to penetrate the thick atmosphere as easily as in the light.

 

“Laugh riot, _Harv_.” Jim responded just as sarcastically. He became more careful in his forward movements feeling ahead before stepping so he would not strike and fall over Harvey when he reached him.

 

“Well hey there,” Harvey greeted when finally, Jim did stumble upon him. He reached up with a hand and Jim grasped it before allowing himself to sit down next to his fellow captive.

 

“That was fun.” Jim sighed and released Harvey’s hand.

 

“Yep. Laugh riot like you said, Buddy. Loads of fun.”

 

Jim placed his head in his hands for a few seconds before everything stopped spinning once more. “I’ve got to be concussed.” He groaned and felt his shoulder touch Harvey’s and left them pressed together. “The room is spinning when I move.”

 

“It’ll pass.” Harvey reassured him softly. “I went through the same thing. Hurts like a bitch for a while though.”

 

“Thanks.” Jim gratified with an unseen smirk. “I think I’ve endured worse, just nothing comes to mind at the moment.”

 

Harvey laughed. “Yeah, same here.” Jim chuckled with him. “Though it is good to have company again.”

 

Jim and Harvey both silently wondered for just how long.

~~~~~~~~

He loved to listen to their conversation; the two cops barely a foot apart in the dark. There were times they sat in silence too, and in those moments, He merely waited; watching their faces and wondering what they were thinking; feeling. He wanted to know everything about them. David had been an experiment; a failed one; and Harvey? He was more successful and would perhaps last the duration of their captivity. But Jim? Jim was the one He was pinning all His hopes on. The perfect one; all of this was done for him; because of him; all of it. He smiled and watched them together. Harvey had an easy way about him and He knew that soon enough he would win Jim’s trust, friendship even. David had almost immediately succumbed to the Bullock charm, but he wasn’t a hardened cop like Jim.

 

Jim was perfect.

 

As the days passed and He watched them, waiting for Jim’s façade to begin to show cracks and it was. They were beautiful too; just like Jim; and He longed to touch him, but He would wait. Patience was a virtue after all. Just into the second week was when Jim finally exploded, fear of the overwhelming and oppressive darkness working its magic. It was beautiful to behold and He almost felt guilty, but then again, He was trying to push Jim towards his destiny, and sometimes you had to make sacrifices for those you upheld as dear. Dear Jim was and He longed to be in the confines of the cell with him, yet Harvey was there instead and He had to live vicariously through the other male’s experience. To be so close to Jim and not able to make him see the truth of his destiny was heartbreaking. But that was His curse to carry.

 

By Jim’s estimation it had been almost a week since his incarceration with Harvey in the darkness. Feeling brave, intrepid, but most likely bored; Jim elected to push away from the wall and attempt to map out the circumference of the room from wall to wall.  In the beginning he heard Harvey speak, ask him what he was doing and when Jim informed him Harvey bade him to reconsider. By then it was too late, he was already far enough away from the wall that he could no longer touch it with his hand, he somehow lost count of the steps talking to Harvey and moving forward at the same time. How could that have happened. He stopped right where he was and began from the last number he remembered and held out his hand; no wall. He took a few more steps and still; no wall. Had he somehow gotten turned around? How was that even possible? He had just walked a straight line. Hadn’t he? Jim realized the white noise he usually heard in the tank was now replaced by the uptake in his breathing rhythm.  He could hear his own breath inside his head. He stumbled forward and reached out with waving arms, seeking and finding nothing but more oppressive darkness.

 

“Harvey?”

 

“Yeah Jim?”

 

Harvey’s voice came from a direction it previously hadn’t sounded from. Just how turned around had he gotten? Why was he panicking?

 

“I did what you told me not too.” There was a plaintive sigh that now sounded distant, or just perhaps it was that way because it was done quietly.

 

“Okay buddy, just stop moving.” Harvey hauled himself up from his seated position and placed one palm upon the wall, the other he stretched out into the darkness. “Hear my voice?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Does it sound loud and clear?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Whatever direction it sounds like it’s _coming_ from? Put your hand out behind you and back away in the _opposite_ direction. Okay Jim?

 

“Yeah, okay.” Jim wet his lips and reached out behind himself. “Here goes nothing.”

 

“Aw, come on Boy Scout. Don’t say that.” Teased Harvey continuing to talk in a steady stream for Jim to latch on too. “Hey, did I ever tell you about the time that my kid brother tried to make a surfboard outta Ma’s old ironing board? It had rained like the great flood in the Narrows and this dumbass thought he’d be like, uh, what’s his face. The best surfer back in nineteen-seventy-four? Remember him?”

 

“No.” Jim stated, hand flailing behind him seeking purchase. Hysteria was slowly rising in his throat like vomit and wasn’t certain Harvey knew what he was talking about, either in the story of distraction, or the actual solution to the problem. Why had he trusted the older male so blindly?

 

“Yeah, that was probably a bit before your time. Anyway, there’s a break in the rain and my dumbass of a little brother hauls this thing down the eight flights to the street. Figuring, you know, there’s enough water in the gutter ‘cause it was washing up over onto the sidewalk.” Harvey paused, chuckling in memory and once he continued he stopped abruptly as he grasped Jim’s fingers. “Hey! There we go. See? I told you; just keep backing up and you’d find me.” He tugged Jim firmly, the younger male gripping his hand, Jim grabbed on to Harvey’s arm like a lifeline and once Harvey helped him touch the wall for reassurance Jim blindly launched himself against Harvey, embracing him tightly. He wasn’t going to panic, no; he was decisively **not** going to do that. Jim’s breath came rapid and thin against the scratch of Harvey’s throat. “It’s okay Jim.” Harvey soothed for a second holding one hand to the back of Jim’s head, the opposite one along his back securely.

 

“Thanks, man.” Jim breathed before severing the embrace. He placed one hand back upon the wall. “I, I should have listened to you.”

 

“So, listening’s not one of your strong suits. Now you know; occasionally Uncle Harvey is right about something.”

 

“That he is.” Jim sat down on the floor his legs threatening to give out anyway. He was trembling slightly and wished he hadn’t embarrassed himself so completely. Harvey sat down beside him and he was thankful that their shoulders were touching. “I owe you one.”

 

“Ah, forget it.” Harvey assured dismissively. “S’not like I didn’t do it myself.”

 

Jim chuckled softly with relief instead of mirth. “I just couldn’t sit here anymore.”

 

“I know.” Harvey placed an arm around Jim’s shoulders and the gesture was far more comforting then Jim had been offered in a long while. He lay his head upon Harvey’s shoulder and closed his eyes, hoping to shut out the darkness and his embarrassment along with it.

 

Jim kept close too Harvey for several hours after that, only after their second meal did he move down the wall to lay down and attempt to sleep. Harvey was mumbling something to himself softly, a story of some kind and Jim only caught every forth word. The tone of his voice lulled Jim towards sleep and it wasn’t long before he lost consciousness. Only to dream; to fall into a nightmare he couldn’t escape from. There was an alley and Jim was running its length. It kept stretching out further and further away from him. He almost couldn’t see the end of it and the street lamps across the street from it.  On and on he ran, sometimes falling and picking himself up, other times stumbling and bouncing off either side of the alley. He was being chased. He could hear the harsh panting of his pursuer gaining on him. He could feel the large entity at his back and it was terrifying. He didn’t have his gun, he didn’t have his badge, he had no way of defending himself so he ran. Ran and prayed he would make it out to the opposite end of the alley before the entity was upon him.

 

Jim cried out and thrashed awake, fighting his way through the darkness, panting and near screaming. He heard Harvey’s voice as a true beacon of reality and stopped fighting when he felt the other man’s hands upon him. Whatever had been chasing him wasn’t human and it didn’t talk, it wouldn’t know his name, it wouldn’t be trying to soothe him. He was safe; as relatively safe as he could be being held prisoner in the dark.

 

Harvey pressed one hand to Jim’s chest and the other he rested upon the nape of his neck, the skin on skin contact calming. “It’s okay, Jim. I’ve got you. Whatever that was it was just a nightmare okay?”

 

“I can’t stand it in here anymore!” Jim exclaimed clutching at Harvey with his hands fisted in the other man’s clothing. “The darkness, the fucking silence and pressure. It’s on my chest! I can barely breathe and I can’t, I can’t take it anymore!”

 

“Shh, shh.” Harvey soothed petting the back of Jim’s head. “Listen to me Jim, we’re gonna get out of here, alright? We’re cops, they gotta be looking for us. So, give them time to do their jobs, huh?” The hand at the nape of Jim’s neck slide to cradle his right cheek. If there had been any light in the room Jim would have been able to see the determination upon Harvey’s face, but now all he had of the man was his touch and the sound of his voice. “You with me?”

 

“Yeah.” Jim gulped groping at Harvey for physical support and pulling himself up further to sit up. “I’m with you.” He pushed himself up further to stand, slightly hunkered and Harvey moved with him by his side. Harvey was three inches taller than Jim, broader and solid. He was a hell of allot softer to lean against then the wall, but Jim used both for support until he could bring his breathing under control once more.

 

It took Harvey another half hour to calm Jim back down, and before long he was seated and Jim was pacing with one hand pressed against the wall. He recited his dream to Harvey and they both agreed it would be enough to frighten anyone awake, let alone someone being held captive in a dark place for an indeterminate amount of time. Finally, Jim could settle down and try to fall asleep once more. This time he rested his head upon Harvey’s shoulder without being offered it and waited for Harvey to protest. He didn’t, and Jim fell back into a dreamless sleep.

 

Five feeding cycles later they came. At first Harvey and Jim had heard the voices outside the door, but couldn’t make out the words. They screamed and pounded on the door hoping that they in turn would be heard. After being directed to get far back from the door as possible, there was a loud bang and a flood of blinding light. Voices, so many voices and Jim squinted his eyes shut to protect himself, cowering a little and putting an arm up across his face. There was a dark movement in front of him and Jim made out the large, white, reflective letters against a black background that spelled: police. Found. They had been found and rescued.

 

He was livid. How could the incompetent Gotham police department find His two captives when their star detective was one of the missing? He had clearly underestimated them; Harvey had been prophetic regarding allowing the bumbling fools to do their jobs. Now His prize was gone and He would have to spend allot of time and effort to get Jim back. Jim was worth it though; no one else had the fortitude that man did. No one. Helpless to do anything but watch the drama unfold and the police cart off His two prisoners, He sat back and studied the chaos. He couldn’t lose sight of Jim now that He had found him. Harvey, was expendable; no longer any interest to Him. He had been a guinea pig at best and a burden at worst. Jim was the one He was interested in. Only Jim.

 

In the hospital Jim was treated with steroidal drops to negate the over dilation of his pupils and given intravenous fluids to combat dehydration. After two days of observation he could return home to his sterile, empty apartment. All he wanted to do was get back to work and find the person or persons responsible for his captivity, but he had been placed on temporary medical leave and instructed to see a counseling group. There were several kinds of groups but none of them; he felt; played into his distinct situation. He had Harvey’s number and about a week into his recuperation he broke down late one night and called.

 

“Hello? Bullock.”

 

Jim closed his eyes allowing the familiar voice to wash over him like a comfortable blanket. “Harvey, it’s Jim.”

 

“Hey Jim!” Harvey greeted happily now a hundred percent invested in the conversation. “I was beginning to think you had forgotten about me.”

 

“Never.” Jim assured breathing the word into the phone. “I mean, I’ve been thinking about our time in that tank.”

 

“Don’t.” Harvey advised knowingly. “See that’s what gets you into trouble, brings the nightmares. No, you just gotta set it out of your mind as far and as quickly as possible. Use alcohol, sex, hell; gambling if you’re feeling adventurous but _do_ **not** think about it.”

 

Despite the situation Jim found himself laughing aloud. “That’s great advice, Harvey. That said, it’s a hell of allot harder to follow.”

 

“I know it is.” Harvey admitted truthfully. “I keep thinking about how it could have gone. Did you hear about David?”

 

“No. I,” Jim paused. “I didn’t know his whole name. Plus, once we got out of there everything has changed so fast…” Jim allowed the statement to drift off displaying his lack of outward notice.

 

“Yeah. I know. Me too.” Harvey finished. “But I have a buddy in Homicide and he said latent evidence on David’s body lead them to us.”

 

“Jesus.”

 

“I know.” Harvey scoffed and continued. “Are you having a hard time like I am?”

 

“Yeah. I think so.” Jim shifted a little upon the couch and rubbed his free hand across his chin. “I can barely sleep, my appetite is gone, I find I lose track of time it’s been, difficult to say the least. And you?”

 

“I’m drunk most of the time.” Harvey informed with a sigh. “Now is no exception.” He chuckled. “Seriously? The same; no sleep, no eating, nightmares when I do sleep, I vomit if I _do_ eat; it’s a fucking mess.”

 

Jim nodded. “Copy that.” He ran a hand back through his blond hair. It was getting longer on top and he wondered briefly if he should cut it. “Do people treat you, _differently_ now?”

 

“Hell yeah.” Harvey informed getting comfortable. “Stare at me like I’m either going to shatter into hysterics or go postal on their asses.”

 

Jim chuckled. “Same for me. I don’t know which is worse.”

 

“Pity. No question.”

 

“I think you’re right.” Jim smiled. “Since you’re drunk all the time, can we meet for a drink?”

 

“Or seventeen?”

 

“Or seventeen. Sure, I’ll even buy the first few rounds.”

 

“Then we should meet.” Harvey gave Jim the name and vague address of one of his preferred watering holes in the city. They set a time to meet and severed the conversation so that Jim could get ready to leave. He was looking forward to seeing Harvey in the light, he hadn’t really gotten a good look at him before they were separated at the hospital. Everything had hurt and blinded him, but a uniformed officer had slipped Jim Harvey’s number as a favor to the older detective.

 

Now they were meeting. Jim was little bit nervous as he looked around the bar, but a friendly face brightened upon seeing him and Harvey waved him over. He hugged Jim when he got close enough. The pressure and solidness of his body was an instant salve to Jim’s discomfort and he could not help but beam in return. Suddenly he didn’t feel so alone or vulnerable to the rest of the world. He patted Harvey’s shoulder and the two sat at the out of the way table and Harvey waved at the waitress so that Jim could order. Within minutes they were sitting in silence as the noise of the bar seemed muted around them. Jim couldn’t help but laugh when he caught Harvey’s eye.

 

“All that time together and this is how we spend our freedom.”

 

Harvey gave a flippant wave and shook his head.  “We’re doing whatever feels right.” Harvey gave a shrug. “Least I am. What about you Jim?”

 

Jim nodded. “Yeah. Exactly.” He revealed his smile growing. He hadn’t had anything to smile about since the abduction so now he was hyper aware of the expression upon his face. He toasted Harvey a little with his glass and took a sip, the whiskey burning as it hit his throat, but it was a good burn, one that warmed his chest all the way down to his stomach. “How have you been? Really?”

 

“Like I said earlier; about the same as you. Nightmares, anxiety; can’t eat, the whole nine.” He shrugged. “Nobody gets it. They act like nothing’s happened.”

 

“Exactly!” Jim agreed as Harvey put words to essentially what had become his life and all his interactions with other people. “It’s not like I know what to say; let alone do; either. The ones that really question me have an agenda, like a press article or psychoanalysis.” He shook his head. “I just want to feel ‘ _real’_ again. Like I did before.”

 

Harvey raised his glass towards his lips. “That ship has sailed Brother, at least for a while yet.” He downed half the glass then studied Jim’s expression as he swallowed. “Do you miss it in a way?”

 

Jim shrugged. “I want to see. That oppressive dark, scared the hell outta me. Do you ever miss it?”

 

Harvey tilted his head. “It was easier. All the bullshit of everyday life didn’t matter. All I had to think about was surviving; having you there; nothing else.”

 

Jim nodded. “I can see that. I mean, if you hadn’t been there I don’t know what I would have done.” It was more than obvious he was thankful that he did not have to find out. Wetting his lips, he locked gazes with Harvey. “So, when David?”

 

Harvey held up a hand to silence Jim’s question. “I lost it.” He admitted so softly that Jim almost missed it. Jim reached out and rested a hand upon Harvey’s wrist.

 

“I’m sorry.” He meant it with his entire being. He had been there with Harvey and was aware of what the interior of the tank had been like. He more than knew what it would have felt like to be alone in that place with no hope or way of knowing when the end would come to either himself or his loneliness. Jim’s hand squeezed Harvey’s wrist. “If you need me,” He feel silent and Harvey placed his hand over Jim’s.

 

“Thanks.” It was enough to say and they stared at one another for a few seconds before Harvey withdrew his hand. Jim looked around the room and then studied Harvey’s features once more.

 

“Do you want to leave? Go someplace less populated?” Harvey did and they rose from the table and made for the exit. Once outside Jim hailed them a cab and gave the address to his apartment. Harvey leaned against the door and rubbed his face with a hand as if trying to will away a severe headache. Without even thinking about it Jim reached out and touched a hand to his head, petting his hair with a gentle pull downward before resting his hand upon the other male’s shoulder.  He gave the appendage a little squeeze before withdrawing his touch. His hand was halfway gone when Harvey blindly surged forward with an arm and grabbed his hand. Jim sat for the rest of the cab ride holding Harvey’s hand and tentatively running his thumb over the back of it tenderly. The physical touch was reassuring as much for him as he hoped it was for Harvey. Neither male felt the need to draw unnecessary attention to the contact nor their need of it. The rest of the cab ride was silent. Once there Jim paid the cabbie and led Harvey to his apartment.

 

The interior of the apartment seemed vast and empty, light where the tank had felt oppressive. It was part of the reason Jim had chosen to bring Harvey here instead of attempt to find a quieter bar. Harvey’s immediate response to the environment was favorable and he removed his hat and coat, Jim quickly hanging both in the entry way closet. He then switched on more lights and moved to the kitchen to fetch a bottle of liquor and two glasses, while Harvey moved to seat himself upon the couch.

 

“How long has it just been you?”

 

“Since the first day I moved in.” Jim admitted. “I know; it feels clinical but before, well; _before_ I was rarely home. Work took precedent over everything in my life.”

 

Harvey nodded. “I can see that.” He reached for the glass of liquor that Jim handed him and took a sip. “My place is pretty, uh; clinical; for the moment, too. Not much of a ‘live with someone’ guy. Seems like you’re not either.”

 

Jim shrugged and seated himself down upon the couch close enough to Harvey that his thigh brushed against the other male’s, and their shoulders touched. “I don’t know. I enjoyed living with my fiancé. We lived at her place though. I just kept this because, well, had a feeling I guess. Either that or I was just too busy to break the lease.”

 

Harvey grunted in response and poured himself another drink from the bottle Jim had provided. He sat back upon the couch leaving the bottle on the coffee table but taking the glass with him. “Okay, let’s hear it.” He motioned to Jim to speak. “Tell me why you’re so desperate that you had to resort to calling me for help.”

 

Jim bit his bottom lip. “It isn’t like you haven’t helped me before.” Jim reminded him sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck for a few seconds. “And as I already explained, no one understands. They weren’t there and you were. There were a few times; more than a few; I actually **believed** that you and I might die down there. How can anyone else relate to that?”

 

Harvey sighed softly. “Have you tried that group the shrinks gave you?”

 

Jim’s jaw tightened. “Have **you**?”

 

“Yeah, I did.” He surprised Jim by admitting. “Granted the stories were different but their reasons for being there were all the same. We were abducted; taken, and confined against our will. It’s not a large percentage of the population that can boast that, but oddly? Here in Gotham there are more then their fair share.”

 

Jim laughed at that, the sound sharp and embittered. “Can’t say you’re wrong there. This city; I look at all the corruption and decay of it and I think to myself, how in the hell can it ever be staunched?”

 

“I’m guessing people like you.” Harvey mused nudging Jim with a gentle elbow. “I mean, that’s what it says in all the news articles anyway.”

 

“Please don’t read those.” Jim requested rubbing his face with a hand as his skin flushed crimson. “It’s nothing but titillating hype and the reality of the situation is so much more complicated and pressing than they advertise. And make no mistake it _is_ advertising.”

 

“So, little faith in the first Amendment there, Jimmy?” Harvey saw how Jim physically flinched at the variation of his name and quickly reversed tack. “I get it; the press can do more harm than good to a case as likely as not. But you should be proud of your accomplishments regardless. You had to work hard to get the results you do.”

 

Jim shrugged. “On occasion, some other well-meaning cop or witness helps me grind away at the status quo. They want the same changes I do; that I know we can achieve if we’re just given the opportunity too. And I’m grateful to them but sometimes it feels like I’m fighting the uphill battle all alone.”

 

“Because you are.” Harvey informed passionately. “Look, don’t get me wrong; I’m all for positive change and the like, but I’m a realist. In this city? You’re lucky if you can find one guy to trust who’ll have your back consistently. Just look what happened to us? Think two cops could disappear in any city other than Gotham and go weeks without being found? I don’t think so. But the point is that eventually the right thing gets done. That’s something, right?”

 

Jim pursed his lips pulling them tight until they were bloodless and pale. “It’s something alright.”

 

“Such a pessimist.” Harvey teased wrapping an arm securely about his shoulders. Jim flinched a little at the unexpected touch yet then immediately relaxed into it fully. Harvey rested his head upon Jim’s and patted his bicep. “Listen, right now we need stick together. I don’t know about you? But knowing that I have you screaming into the abyss with me makes all the difference in the world.”

 

Jim nodded. It certainly did.

~~~~~~~~

The next few weeks Jim spent the majority of time with Harvey. They talked on the phone, they met for drinks or meals, sometimes even just to hang out in either of their apartments with one another. They even attended the same group sessions on occasion for abduction peer counseling. In the end, they found that spending time together rather than in a group was the most beneficial to them. Their friendship grew and their physical comfort around one another as well. They liked to be in contact either by a hand on a body part here, or a limb pressed to another there; the action more natural than odd to either of them. It was easy for them to justify to themselves or others if necessary, but in truth no one asked and they never saw a reason to question their gravitation to one another physically. Jim convinced Harvey to put in a transfer from the fraud division of the 75th precinct to come over to the Homicide division in his station house. After pooling a few favors and a threat to the acting police commissioner, Jim procured Harvey as his new partner. The work suited the older male well and before long they were closing their cases.

 

The closer they got the more avidly He tried to monitor them. It was much more difficult now that the two were free from His make shift prison. He wanted to get Jim back into His control before too long. Jim was slipping, needed to be cowed and owned by the darkness once more. Harvey was becoming a hindrance and would need to be removed from the equation. Loathe as He was to admit it, Jim’s attachment to the Irishman was problematic. Harvey seemed to infuse the younger male with doubts rather than the strength He so carefully laid at Jim’s door during his captivity. Murder was such a messy and unpleasant task; if there were a way He could contrive that Jim would kill Harvey all the better. Death from a distance. He was accomplished at that; with His own hands David’s death had been, well, unfortunate but necessary. David was a failed experiment and had been a stepping stone to His perfect creation in Jim Gordon.  Harvey was a failure in his own right and He had known from the beginning that the older male was not what the darkness fed on. He had broken the moment David had disappeared from the room and been so relieved when Jim arrived that it was almost comical.

 

Jim though; had not broken. He had been infused by the terror the darkness could bring and that fear had fanned the flames of violence that He knew existed deep within Jim. All he needed was a slight nudge for the anger to come tumbling out and spew its molten violence across the Gotham cityscape. Harvey couldn’t understand that; might cling to Jim and beg him to relent. Jim would never be able to withstand the plea of a friend and He couldn’t abide that. Not after all He had done to create his beautiful, perfect, rage of flesh and bone.  He watched Jim and waited for the most effective way to insight Jim’s fathomless violence.

 

Jim sat upon Harvey’s couch and was watching the news expecting Harvey to bring him a second beer when he held out a file folder instead. Jim frowned and looked from the folder to Harvey’s expression, but took the file from Harvey regardless.

 

“What’s this?”

 

“David Carlson.” Jim’s brow furrowed still deeper and Harvey added, “The accountant that was in the tank with me.” Jim’s expression paled somewhat and he looked from the folder deeply into Harvey’s gaze. “I got the case file from a new buddy of mine at the 20th. They caught the call. And, well; you never really asked much about him.”

 

Remorse colored Jim’s gaze making it appear a deeper blue and he shook his head. “It’s not that I didn’t care I just,” He pursed his lips before quickly finishing, “didn’t want to know for certain how it might have ended for us.”

 

“I know.” Harvey sympathized having suspected that but also accepting that Jim might not have cared at all. “But knowledge is power and you and I need some closure. What happened to us happened to him first. Figured you’d want to honor his memory somehow. Or at least, I don’t know; see if you and I can reverse engineer the whole thing and find the fucking bastard that did this.” Harvey shrugged. “If you’re up to it that is.”

 

Jim looked at the file and then rolled his gaze up to Harvey’s once more. “This is important to you?”

 

“Yeah.” Harvey announced unclear as to why it wasn’t the same to Jim. “I’d like your help.”

 

“Then you have it.” Jim wet his lips and opened the file, eyes immediately falling to the DMV photo copy of David Carlson’s license. He quickly flipped through the preliminary information and went immediately to the coroner’s report. The man had been an absolute mess according to the findings. As Jim read something about the file didn’t sit right with him. He flipped through the rest of it, skimming bits here and there completely unsatisfied with the information he found. “This is everything?”

 

Harvey sat down beside Jim upon the couch. “My guy says it’s complete. Why?”

 

“I don’t know.” Jim stated shaking his head. “The detective’s notes, the background check, family and coworker statements- it just seems a little sterile; incomplete.”

 

Harvey held out his hand for the file and Jim handed it back to him. Harvey opened it upon the coffee table and read through it quickly. “Huh.” He looked at Jim. “Let me call the coroner and see if I can get a fresh copy of the report.” To Harvey the report looked as any other he had ever seen, but if Jim’s instincts were telling him something wasn’t right then he trusted him. For the rest of their evening together Harvey recounted all that he had known about David and admitted to the desire to contact his family but refrained out of respect for them and discomfort for himself. Jim reassured him that he had done the right thing by choosing to stay away, but was thankful when the conversation finally turned away from a dead man that he and Harvey could have easily joined.

 

In the final hour of their visit, Harvey rested his head against Jim’s shoulder slumping on the couch a little to accommodate their three-inch height difference. Jim found himself holding Harvey’s hand in his own to make the connection even more intimate and they sat in silence until Harvey drifted off to sleep. Jim indulged himself by placing a kiss upon the other man’s head before resting his own on it. They could sit in silence sometimes and neither one felt the need to speak. They had learned in the darkness that sometimes words were unnecessary and true emotion shown through regardless. Strip away pride and expectation and they were left only with the truth.

 

The truth was brutal but Jim preferred it to the lies he heard every day; to the corruption he faced. Unbeknownst to him that was the precise reason why He had chosen Jim as His ultimate creation. The truth, no matter how abrasive or raw belonged on Jim’s skin, and if he didn’t break after it in the darkness there would be no stopping him in the future. The perfect legacy created by the perfect Monster. He was proud and all he needed to do was convince Jim he didn’t need Harvey to hold him back. True freedom lies in the darkness.

 

Harvey’s contacts at the 20th and coroner’s office all confirmed that the information in the David Carlson file was complete. Harvey even surreptitiously re-interviewed the man’s wife and a couple of colleagues along with Jim, and their stories had not changed.  While Jim was focused on what was allegedly absent from the investigation, Harvey focused upon the existing evidence. Could the great Jim Gordon be wrong? It was possible. Did Harvey believe Jim was looking too closely to see the truth? Or did he believe that Jim was right? Hard questions and even harder won answers, Harvey took the cowards way out; at least temporarily; and put the case to rest. Jim didn’t ask about it as they had ongoing open cases of their own, and Harvey no longer pushed with not so subtle reminders that they should be considering David Carlson’s death once more.

 

One afternoon they were in the run-down industrial part of Gotham where they had been held captive and Harvey looked over from the driver’s seat to the passenger side and Jim’s gaze met his own.  They were finished with their case business and on the way back to the station house when at Jim’s behest, Harvey made a detour. He pulled onto the property and drove around the gutted complex until he reached the south side of the property and the tanks that lined it in two neat rows. He stopped the car and killed the engine, his eyes slipping to Jim’s once again.

 

“Are you sure?” Jim nodded then faced out the windscreen his expression tight and determined. “It’s not going to help.”

 

“It might.”

 

They had flash lights with them this time; and the situation was vastly different. They found the proper tank and entered through the blown open door. Jim took a deep breath and Harvey felt his hands shake before he steadied the flashlight. Jim looked at him, shinning his beam into Harvey’s face. “You alright?”

 

“No Jim, I’m **not**. This is a stupid ass idea. Why are we even doing this?”

 

“Because it doesn’t make any sense _not_ to.” Jim snapped in return. He moved the light away from Harvey’s features and pointed it to the wall. He walked over to the opposite side of the tank from where his partner stood and placed a hand upon the wall. Slowly he walked a few steps feeling as he had previously in his captivity, palm skimming the surface of the concrete.  “Because nothing makes sense anymore.”

 

Harvey watched him, his own back to the door frame, flashlight beam tracking his partner’s movements. “I know it doesn’t Brother, but this is not doing anything but reopening wounds.”

 

“Or healing them.” Jim stated softly still rubbing his palm over the texture of the wall. “Where do you think we were? About here?” Jim pointed his flashlight a distance to the stain on the floor where the waste bucket had previously stood. “Yeah,” he shinned the light back at the wall. “Right, about, here.” He spaced each word and nodded to himself as his gaze traveled up the wall to the ceiling. He shinned the beam above his head and grunted to himself. “You were right; two men in height.”

 

“Yeah.” Harvey deadpanned itching to turn tail and exit the tank back into the cold daylight once more. “And I know that because of David.”

 

Jim’s brow furrowed. “Did,” Jim paused and turned to look at Harvey. “did you let him stand on your shoulders?”

 

“Maybe.” Harvey sheepishly accounted looking away. “Now can we get outta here?”

 

“You can go if you want. I need another few minutes.” Harvey didn’t budge, but rather watched Jim move around the circumference of the tank before counting his steps across the diameter. He smiled broadly to himself and stated the number of steps aloud in near awe. “If I had stayed calm I would have made it across.”

 

“You got turned around. A pitch black, circular room has that effect on people.” Harvey was tense. “We have to get back Jim.”

 

“We will.” Jim assured Harvey over his shoulder as he reversed his walk around the tank interior to return to the door.

 

Happily, Harvey stepped outside and was quite relieved when Jim immediately followed. Both men were silent during the walk back to the car and the subsequent ride back to the station house. While Jim as content to be lost in his own thoughts Harvey was concerned about having gone back to their prison. In his estimation, it hadn’t been a very smart idea to return, but return they had and he knew he was the worse for it, but the only saving grace was that perhaps; for Jim; it had made a constructive difference.

 

Several hours later Harvey was sitting in his apartment drinking whiskey and Jim knocked upon the door. Harvey let him in with a soft ‘hey’ and the two sat down upon the couch. There was another tumbler that had been awaiting Jim’s arrival, even though neither had broached an invitation to meet tonight. Harvey filled the glass half way and topped off his own. He was seated forward on the couch, elbows on his knees and he ran a hand over his mouth in thought. He turned and looked at Jim, who sat back, fingers locked behind his head and elbows raised. He was staring at his drink but neglecting to make a move for it.

 

Harvey said, “What the fuck was that today? Why now, Jim?”

 

Jim lowered his arms and briefly pinched the bridge of his nose with the thumb and forefinger of his left hand, his eyes closed. “I don’t know, Harvey.” He lowered his hand and opened his eyes, meeting Harvey’s intense, green, stare. “I really don’t. I _hoped_ it would give me some sense of, closure maybe?” He shrugged, “I really don’t know.” He leaned forward and picked up his drink and took a sip before he met Harvey’s gaze once more.

 

“Bullshit!” That stunned Jim, his lips parted but he said nothing to deny Harvey’s assessment. “ **You** wanted to go there. **You** were the one that asked. _You_ have some ulterior motive, I can see it in your eyes.” He pointed at Jim. “ _That_! Right there. Don’t you **dare** lie to me Jim. I’m your partner. Your brother in this; in _everything_ ; so, don’t you **dare** lie to me.”

 

Jim reached out with a hand and placed it around Harvey’s finger and gently lowered their hands. “It isn’t something sinister Harvey.”

 

“I _know_. How could I ever think **that** about you? Just answer the question of why and I’ll shut up about this. Done; for good.”

 

Jim pulled his lips into his mouth and released his hold upon Harvey’s hand. He swallowed and mirrored Harvey’s stance before barely stating, “Every second, of every day, since we’ve been out?” Jim paused and searched Harvey’s eyes for acceptance. “I’m still in there. In the dark just, waiting to _die_ , or _live_ , or I don’t know what. Just, just **waiting**.”

 

Harvey’s gaze prickled with excess moisture as he nodded a few times in understanding. “I hear you Jim, I do. I just, want to get you out of there somehow. I want you to walk in the light again; I want us _both_ too.”

 

“Yeah, I know you do. And I appreciate it, it really means allot to me but- “Jim paused and leaned his shoulder against Harvey’s pressing their arms together. “I’m on the inside looking out. Like someone is in the darkness watching me; watching us and I’m scared. All the time now. To be alone; to be with you; to go to work; to do _anything and everything_.” Jim wet his lips and searched Harvey’s expression. “I can’t live like this much longer.”

 

“So, you’re trying to find a way out in that tank?” Jim looked away, shame coloring his cheeks and Harvey placed an arm around his partner’s shoulders and held him securely against him.  “Jim? Listen to me. I know you’re struggling. I see that. But I’m here, okay? No matter what you _think_ , or _feel_ I’m **here** for you.” He placed a kiss upon Jim’s temple and pressed his forehead against it seconds later, his lips nearly brushing Jim’s skin as he said, “And I’m sorry to tell you this, but I think the only way out of that place is through. You and me; together; we’ll get through this. I promise you. Alright? I swear on all that’s holy that you and I are gonna make it.”

 

Jim closed his eyes and collapsed against Harvey, muscles going lax as he leaned in against Harvey’s solid bulk. He enjoyed the anchor to the moment as well as the strength that Harvey held internally as well as externally. Dependable, accepting; affectionate; loving. Jim loved all these things about Harvey and was thankful beyond measure that he had the older male in his life now. Perhaps Harvey was right; the only way out was through the pain and on the other side sunlight awaited. Some measure of peace that he could achieve with showing solidarity with Harvey against their unseen assailant. Some cases were never solved and Jim was not so certain that David Carlson’s and theirs should be. As much trauma as their mysterious abductor had caused he had succeeded in bringing Jim the best friend he had ever had and for that, Jim was immensely thankful.

~~~~~~~~

The nightmares wouldn’t cease. No matter what he tried every time he closed his eyes to sleep he would wake up in a sweat, heart pounding, blood humming in fear or anger. He was unable to go back to sleep once he awoke so soon the dark circles under his eyes and the amount of coffee he drank was more than noticed by Harvey. It came to the point where his pallor and hair trigger anger prompted Harvey to pull his partner aside in the locker room during a shift.

 

“Are you sleeping?” Harvey demanded pressing Jim back into a locker face by the shoulders with his hands.

 

“What?” Jim was incredulous.

 

“Are, you, getting, any, sleep, at night?” Harvey responded spacing each word as he did so.

 

“What does that have to do with- “

 

“ _Everything_ Jim!” Harvey informed placing one hand upon Jim’s chest and motioning with the other.  “You’re snapping at everyone, pounding back the coffee like it’s water and looking like you’re about to collapse. I’m telling you it makes for sloppy police work and Jim, you don’t do sloppy. I don’t want you being careless out there with your own life let alone mine.”

 

Anger fused Jim’s gaze into a narrow focus. “Is that all?”

 

“All? Isn’t that _enough_ for you?” Harvey shook his head. “Jesus Jim, does this have something to do with the other day when we went back there?”

 

“No, of course it doesn’t!” Jim back peddled quickly. He reached out with his own arm to pace his forearm across Harvey’s upper chest and push him backward from him. “I’m **fine**.” He stressed the last word with some heat behind it and held gazes with Harvey.

 

“No, you are not, Brother.” Harvey replied softly, concern affixed to his features and within his eyes. He rubbed the hand that was on Jim’s chest in small circles as he continued speaking. “Fine is the farthest thing you and I are from being. Talk to me, Jim. I was there. I know, okay? I **know**.”

 

“I have to face something there.” Jim whispered, costing him dearly to tell Harvey the truth; to allow him in. Yet at the moment Harvey was the only person in the world that Jim could, or would open up to. “The darkness; it’s not leaving. Every time I close my eyes, it’s _there_.”

 

Tears pricked at Jim’s large, deep, blue gaze and it broke Harvey’s heart to see it. He pulled Jim forward into a fierce hug and squeezed him tightly until he felt Jim’s arms encircle him as well. “Okay Jim. S’all right.” He took a breath and pulled back from their hug enough to make eye contact with Jim. “Tell me what you need me to do?”

 

Jim shook his head. “There’s nothing.” A tear escaped his eye and Harvey quickly wiped it away with his fingertips.

 

“Alright then.” Harvey stepped back from Jim and placed both his hands upon the younger male’s shoulders holding him at arms-length. “I’ll be your shadow until we figure this out.”

 

“No, Harvey. No.” Jim shook his head and reached up to take Harvey’s left wrist and lower that arm away from him. “You can’t. You’re dealing with your own shit and you don’t need to shoulder mine on top of it.”

 

“Who said anything about taking your load, Junior?” Harvey withdrew and motioned to himself with both his hands. “Alls I’m sayin’ is that I’m here for you. We went through the same thing so I get it. I really do. But beyond that we’re friends now Jim. I have your back and you have mine.” He tapped at Jim’s tie with a finger just over his heart. “Now are you thinking of doing something Looney Tunes? Or do you just want me to come by after shift with beer and a pie so we can talk?”

 

Jim looked down and closed his eyes, gently rubbed his forehead before answering, “Come over. Around eight and we’ll, we’ll talk some more.”

 

“See?” Harvey asked holding his hands apart. “That’s all it takes. No more need for chugging coffee, and treating suspects and witnesses like **I** treat suspects and witnesses.”

 

Jim nodded and promised, but the second Harvey’s back was too him, his smile slipped and he felt his hands begin to shake. He had to go back to the tank; to see for himself that it no longer posed any threat.  He would go after sunset and be home in time to meet with Harvey. He didn’t need much time there, and it would be enough. Jim wasn’t the only one who with an inclination to return to the tank. _He_ did as well. Every night He was there waiting for Jim to return. He knew that Jim wouldn’t be able fight the darkness off forever and one day would return to embrace it; to finish what He had started for Jim. Seeing the car park near the tanks and then Jim step out into the night, His heart was overjoyed. His perfect creation; His masterpiece was nearly within His grasp.

 

Jim had a flashlight and only used it to light his way to the correct tank. He shown it inside to make certain that there were no hidden animals or people within. He had come here to be alone with the darkness. Disappointed he looked at the warped door leaning against the outer side of the tank. He put away the flashlight and moved the door closer, dragging it across the gravel and concrete ground. Once he stepped inside the tank he turned around and fit the door back the best he could. One good shove from his side of the opening and the door would give way to the outside world. While it wasn’t ideal, it was the best he could do.

 

On instinct Jim counted his steps from the hatch opening and made his way partially around the inside wall of the tank to approximately where he and Harvey had spent their time together. He lowered himself to sit upon the ground, knees up and wrists resting upon them. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, feeling the tendrils of the darkness come to press against him like a sleepy lover waking to lustful hunger. He thought he heard the door scrape against the floor, but it sounded quite distant and he ignored it. Instead, he took a few deeper breaths before opening his eyes imagining his past captivity.

 

“You’ve come home.” The voice was so close Jim nearly startled out of his skin. He sprang up to a crouch hand groping for his service weapon and coming up with the flashlight instead. It was knocked violently from his hand across the floor. “You don’t need that. You never did. Don’t you understand that?” The voice circled him and Jim stood, turning this way or that facing the speaker too late. “The darkness you feel is _in_ you; it **is** you. You can’t escape it because it’s who you are; **truly** are, Jim Gordon. You _are_ **darkness**.”

 

Stilling his own breath so the only sounds he would hear were those of his tormenter, Jim waited until he got an audible fix on the other man’s breathing rhythm. He leapt in the direction of the speaker and his hands closed around fabric and flesh. He roared and tried to throw his opponent against the wall but the man only laughed when he came into contact with it. He pressed a hand to Jim’s throat and applied pressure.

 

“You can’t fight it, Jim. You can’t excise it. You can’t escape it. The truth is darkness and you’ve got to accept your place in it.”

 

“No, I, **don’t**!” Jim ground out pushing forward and closing his own hands around the assailant’s neck.  The man laughed through his choking and Jim hauled back with one fist and let it fly, connecting with flesh and bone. He felt teeth open a wound upon his knuckle.

 

“That’s the spirit! Again! Surrender to it.”

 

Jim obeyed by punching the man several times in succession, before reaching for his gun. He wanted to stop the perpetrator from laughing ever again. Just as badly as he wanted to stop the nightmares and his loss of grip upon his own life. He wanted silence and if darkness came along for the ride then so be it. Jim was going to take the law into his own hands and consequences be damned. He released the man and heard him move to his left, he drew his gun, aimed down the wall and pulled the trigger. Screaming in frustration he continued firing.

 

Harvey had knocked three times on the apartment door, tried Jim’s cell double that number, and he was tired of waiting in the hallway like some lost delivery boy. One of Jim’s neighbors kept poking their head out of their front door even after Harvey flashed his badge. That didn’t do anything to make him feel less comfortable beneath their scrutiny and he abandoned the idea of seeing Jim and returned to his car. He had a six pack of bottled beer and a large pizza to consume after all. Yet as he started the engine he couldn’t help the niggling feeling that he was missing something; something important. He replayed the conversation he had with Jim earlier in the locker room. What if…?

 

“Na, he _wouldn’t_.” Harvey considered his statement and countered, “This is Jim after all.” Harvey gave himself a few more seconds to consider the facts and probabilities before cursing softly to himself and pulling into traffic. He was going to go to the tank and see if his partner was there; just to be safe. Harvey cursed once more to himself as he noted that Jim’s car was parked at the industrial site near the tanks. He then began a mumbling blue streak as he killed the engine and climbed out into the chilled evening air. He tromped towards the tank he knew Jim was located, abruptly realized he had forgotten a flashlight and reversed direction to the car. Grumbling he retrieved the ‘fucking thing’ and his blood turned to ice water in his veins the instant he heard  gunshots echo through the night. Harvey dropped all pretense of friendly approach and charged towards the sound praying that he wasn’t too late, that Jim was alive and well and had not eaten his own gun.

 

Huffing and puffing Harvey hauled the door aside and allowed it to drop as he shinned the flashlight beam inside the tank. He saw Jim slumped against the wall, bent a little at the waist, holding his firing arm to him, left lax at his side.

 

“Jim? Buddy?” Harvey called to him hand still upon his own thirty-eight. “You alive?”

 

“Yeah Harv,” Jim assured slipping down the wall and turning his back to it. “I’m alive.” Harvey rushed immediately over to Jim and knelt before him, checking him for wounds. There was a tear through his suit jacket, shirt, undershirt to the skin where pieces of concrete had torn through and imbedded themselves within tender flesh. Also, his knuckles were bloodied, his left hand immensely swollen and raw. “It’s okay.” Jim informed Harvey eyes shifting away from his into the darkness where He lay unmoving. “It’s gonna be okay now.”

 

Harvey took Jim’s face in his hands and held eye contact. “Jim? What did you _do_?” He inquired gently. “Why did you come back here? What’s going on?”

 

“Avenged us.” Jim informed leaning his forehead against Harvey’s. “I saved us.” Harvey was about to say something but fell silent when Jim’s mouth made tender contact with his own. The kiss was sweet, slow and had Harvey’s heart pounding faster than his run to the tank.

 

Severing the kiss Harvey glanced away from Jim in the direction of where the still body should have lain a few feet from them and nodded. He looked back at Jim and stroked his face. “We’ll take care of this, and get you cleaned up. No one has to know.” Jim huffed in his ear and continued staring at the same empty space until Harvey turned his chin gently.

 

“Thank you.” Jim breathed falling forward into Harvey’s solid embrace. He clung to Harvey’s coat with his messed-up hand, fingers painful to grip into a fist around the leather. “Thank you.”

 

Harvey kissed Jim’s head and knew his partner was fortunate to be alive. But what in the hell had made him fire his weapon?

 

Two months later the cast on Jim’s left arm and hand was ready to come off. The wounds upon his shoulder and chest had healed long before, only pebbling scars remaining to indicate that anything had ever happened. Harvey had helped Jim move into his apartment and their relationship had blossomed; becoming something neither one required to name out loud, but accepted was until the great equalizer of death separated them. Jim’s nightmares ceased and Harvey hoped that whatever happened that night in the tank was to thank for it, and Jim never said otherwise. Harvey was happy to accept the win and soon enough his own terrorized memories of his time in the tank were fading to a dull sting. He felt fortunate in that being held captive had brought Jim into his life and he had never been happier; Jim relaying the same feelings in return. While he realized he would probably never know whom had held him captive or why, he decided that if Jim was convinced they were out of harm’s way then he had faith in the same. It didn’t matter to him anymore the who, how, or why’s. All Harvey wanted was to be happy. With Jim curled up in his arms in bed, it was difficult to argue that there was anything to be concerned about that event ever again.

 

Jim rubbed his cheek gently against Harvey’s chest and sighed contentedly. He was happy for the first time in his life.  He was complete and he had only one person to thank for that. His captor, his creator, his beacon into the abyss. Jim had surrendered; accepted his destiny and would be forever grateful to Him for his guidance.

 

“I told you.” He said just behind Jim’s right ear.  “You **are** the darkness.” Jim’s head rose and whipped around so fast he nearly pulled a muscle, as he stared into His face for the first time.

 

“What’s wrong Baby?” Harvey asked softly stroking his hair. Jim turned his back to their captor and rested it upon Harvey’s chest once more. There was no need for the darkness within him to answer.


End file.
